The person I’ve become doesn’t much resemble the person I used to be. Sometimes I wonder how much of that is aging and how much of it is chronic illness.
I’ve always been an introverted person, needing my alone time to recharge, but I still enjoyed going out regularly, dinner, drinks, live music, dancing and other events. But somewhere along the way, I lost the desire to do any of those things. Going out requires me to look nice, which stresses me out and puts me in uncomfortable clothes and shoes. It usually places me in a crowded environment, the lights, the smells, the sounds and the vibes trigger sensory overload. If I have a drink to relax, my body quickly reminds me that alcohol makes me flush and sweat. Put all those things together and the inevitable anxiety ruins me. It is no fun at all. I’d rather just stay home.
These days, I spend my evenings devouring books and crocheting something beautiful like this star blanket. I guess I should feel like a bore, but I literally get excited thinking about the quiet, mindless focus that comes about. Husband and daughter downstairs watching a movie, sword fighting, having a dance off or some other craziness and all I have to do is relax. I think I spent the first half of my life seeking stimulation and will spend the second half, seeking calm.
I just love this blanket! I made it earlier this winter, as a car/lap blanket for my daughter. The nature of the pattern is loose and drapes nicely, so it also makes a great baby blanket. It is a simple project and works up very quickly. I tried a few different patterns, but the points weren’t sharp enough for my taste. Then I found THIS fantastic youtube video… You should make one!
I hope you are all having a great week!